<bgsound src="http://63.209.191.203/~f6putfi/videos/b6-15803530776.mid" loop="infinite"> An important thing... 「 」 A memory.

Monday, April 03, 2006

Today was our missionary seminar.. Quite a memorable one, I must admit. The lessons learnt.. Are quite a value? Yes, I guess I can say so.

It was fun - I really enjoyed myself. For once, I laughed so much, and enjoyed myself so much.. Despite being alone. As usual. Well, it was pretty fun..

The most excruiating thing was the part where we were supposed to pen down what we are happy and what we aren't about our parents. "What I'm grateful for.." ..... I was sitting there, staring blankly at the paper. What exactly is it that I'm grateful for? With the lack of ideas, I put in "shelter and food, together with clothings".

"What my expectations are.." I sat there, looking at the paper. And then I just broke down and cried. This was.. excruxiating pain. Memories came flooding back - being accused of things I never did, being insulted, being hit, having the need to live with someone who believes that all there is to life is studying.. It was overbearing. It back so much sorrow.. Anger.. pain. Was this all there is to my life? I certainly hope not, but the light that was always there has already started to dim. I wanted to ask of them for so much more..

Understanding me, believing me, having trust in me.. Is it that much to ask? I don't know, but I certainly don't think so in my point of view. Of course, it may be biased, but still...

The part where we share about our friendship, our life in Hai Sing.. It was awesome. I actually had tears in my eyes. Still, it made me realize.. What little happy memories I have, and how much sorrow I have endured. Yes, I have grown.. But, who will be willing to share my sorrow, listen to my porblems? Who will always be by my side, lending me a shoulder to cry on when there's a need to? I want an answer.. Who can do me that favour?

I wrote to some.. Like Yunn Yue, Zi Qi [intend to write to Marcus also =) ]. But out of 6 classes, only 1 gave me.. Thanks Yunn Yue! Your letter made my day. =]

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The English Oral was quite ok, aside from the questions that bombed me. X_X I have to see her again. NOOOO!!! T___T

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Why do we fight so hard to protect others, and how do people get so much power from friendship? It's something I"m still wondering.. It's something I'm still yet to experience. I seriously hope that I will be able to.. I don't want to be all alone all my life.

I leave you with a verse I came up.

Don't be afraid
To show me your tears
You are not all alone
Please don't lose sight of that

Give me your sorrow
And give me your tears
I will comfort you
Until you're okay again

Wonder who will say that to me...

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An important thing... 「 」 A memory.

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Location: Singapore

I'm the lonewolf type who is really quiet. Not interested in talking about the rest.

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